Yeah, but no: Why you shouldn’t get courting advice from a girl

Posted 05 Oct 2011 — by Harry
Category Confidence, Dear Sis, How to, Provocative

This article could have been aptly named “How to make women feel wonderful while cementing yourself into the friend zone” – because all of the stuff suggested (read the whole thing!) is written by a a girl imagining what might work on women. She has never seduced a woman.

You're the perfect man. Any woman would be lucky to have you. Just not me.

She’s also rarely (if ever) been seduced in this way. Most of the time, she chose a guy she fancied and went after him (because that is exactly what he wanted her to think).

If you want to attract women, find a way to be comfortable, happy, outgoing (and funny!), and let her come to you. Make her think she’s made the effort and then she will value you.

The only things worth having are those which are hard to get.

The article starts:

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Dear Sis: He just stopped calling?

Posted 31 Aug 2011 — by Harry
Category Dear Sis, Rants

I keep getting asked to write this blog. I have resisted because I must sheepishly admit that I’ve done one or two ‘cease and desist’ breakups before.

As I am (or have on occasion, been) one of those pricks, I can give you the inside scoop.

But first, let’s be honest, if a guy ‘just stops calling you’ then things weren’t ‘going great’. They sucked, in some way or another, and your ability to recognise and be honest about that is really important. We should all remember that the world operates how it does regardless of how we like to imagine it does. Learn to spot the warning signs.

Disclaimer: Some of these scenarios might seem a bit autobiographical, but any resemblance to real people, living or dead, is purely incidental and possibly also accurate. Read More

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Artificial Stupidity: A Discussion with Cleverbot

Posted 30 Aug 2011 — by Harry
Category Rants

I was busy procrastinating and started to ponder the future of the human race. I wanted to see how artificial intelligence is coming along, and had a chat with Cleverbot. Evidently, she can mimic about the level of intelligence of an annoying autistic kid with echolalia.

User: I am procrastinating.

Cleverbot: I love procrastinating.

User: Then I get nothing done.

Cleverbot: We could do it. Read More

How nerds flirt: Like a boss

Posted 30 Aug 2011 — by Harry
Category Uncategorized

I knew there should be a way to be a nerd and seductive. All I need now is a bright red jacket and a PHD in astrophysics.

Thanks to 9gag.com

The dangers of flirting

Posted 27 Jul 2011 — by Harry
Category Dear Sis, How to

You look great in that skirt you're almost wearing

Us poor men are thoroughly disadvantaged when it comes to flirting with the fairer sex. We foolishly expect you to behave like us, yet dislike it when you do. Apparently this minefield just gets crazier…

Someone recently told me about how she’d received a clumsy e-mail proposition: “I think you looked great in that skirt. Fancy a drink sometime?” and she was offended. I was sufficiently befuddled by her use of the word ‘offended’ (even after a long and probing discussion on the topic), so I posted it on my Facebook status – and it received over 100 responses. Read More

Girls should read this: Pick-Up Artist infographic

Posted 07 Jul 2011 — by Harry
Category How to

Women your age…

Posted 05 Jul 2011 — by Harry
Category Dear Sis

Dean Ornish – Your genes are not your fate

Posted 28 May 2011 — by Harry
Category TED talks

This is a heartwarming idea – that our lifestyle can ‘switch on’ our good genes, and cause our biology to express the most useful parts of ourselves, if given the right amount of relaxation, challenge and reward.

While people who eat broccoli still die (thanks to Frank Farrelly for pointing that out) those who eat well, have fun, exercise hard, work hard and rest well are rewarded. They are blessed with the ability to properly enjoy the brief moment that passes between being not born yet and being dead already.

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Barry Schwartz talks about the paradox of choice

Posted 16 May 2011 — by Harry
Category TED talks

Since this old TED talk from Dan Gilbert about what makes us happy, I’ve often been wondering about the apparent contradiction – of our desire to choose, and to have choices available to us, versus the paralysis that choice can cause.

Since coming across some bits of research that suggest we invariably regret the things we didn’t do far more keenly than the things we did, Dan’s talk made me wonder: Surely in an environment where we’re inundated with choices, any decision we make is going to lead to immediate feelings of regret – because we’re choosing one product, one brand of margarine, and rejecting hundreds of others.

Typical buyers remorse eh?

Though a bit of choice couldn’t be hard. I recon Barry Schwartz could have chosen to wear some trousers and a nice shirt without running the risk of experiencing too much regret…

Questions about coaching

Posted 11 May 2011 — by Harry
Category Provocative

Questions spawned after listening to this BBC radio program with voice coach Patsy Rodenburg after Adrian Goodall‘s helpful suggestion that I hear it. I’m often in a state of flux with exactly how provocative I can be with clients.

As people climb through the ranks of power, there often develops a vacuum of critical feedback. There are fewer and fewer superiors to offer it, the minions become afraid of being critical. The hilariousness is that this is exactly when feedback is most important – particularly in the case Patsy talks about: A boss who mumbles instructions and then complains about not being listened to. (Don’t you hate saying ‘What?’ to a boss more than once?)

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